Monday, December 21, 2009
Elizabeth Esther is a blogwriter I enjoy reading. Introduced to me by Molly Piper (whom I also don't know).
I like Elizabeth Esther because she's blunt, has an interesting backstory, and is fun to read.
But reading this past entry scared me because I hated being the child left at school waiting (this happened often; to the point where the librarian knew us since Joy and I would just go to the library after school.. well to be fair, we were supposed to since for some reason my mom was scheduled to be late every day...) either that, if oma didn't show, we'd walk to the YMCA to see if she was working out or go to swim club or walk home. memories are hazy.
I remember in 1st or 2nd grade I missed the bus or my parents didn't come and I walked home and cried the whole way. My parents told me I was brave. I remember walking over a bridge and all the cars were wooshing by and there were more cars underneath.
Anyway, I don't want to be the mom who forgets. But this already shows me I will. And that a strong woman might suddenly swoon at blood, and go crazy that her brains will melt out.
I know this is way far for me, but it still scares me. Especially as I teach middle school kids and see how different students turn out due to different parenting techniques, especially as I volunteer at a Woman/Children's AIDs shelter where I see how little children don't get consistent discipline and love... especially as I live in Taiwan where children are treated... differently (compared to America), and as I reminisce back to my own childhood.. I get scared.
In other news of scared-ness, I'm afraid I'm going to get lost at the airport going to Korea, and later have a hard time going to my grandparents' place. I'm afraid that people are going to despise me because I suck at Korean. I'm afraid I'm going to be tongue-tied and stutter. I'm afraid I'll be selfish, or tired, or act up like a big drama queen. I'm afraid I won't want to show mercy and patience when injustice rears its ugly face. I'm afraid I won't be able to yield my rights.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
the premise is understandably disturbing as it unfolds a plot about a student-teacher relationship.
while trying to shrug off that part (and also reminding myself that all the high school 'students' are around 6' something and look like college grads), I couldn't help but be drawn to the wonderful way this drama portrayed teaching.
i could relate with the first day of school and Na bori's hopes of trying to win over the students and also figuring out what to do about teacher-student dynamics since she's so young.
i also loved the conversations about helping the students or what to do as a teacher and the semi-helplessness and then the acceptance of making do with the situation.
i also remembered what it's like to be a student and the issues concerning that (love, family, poverty, grades) and how in high school those WERe the life-death situations. hence a lot of tears were shed while watching this drama.
it's very similar to Gokusen with a little random smaller plot within the episode, and i liked that. i loved just the.. old school love and care that the class displayed and the solidarity.
so unrealistic; random stray storylines.. but yeah i liked it. <3
and you can write off irrational behavior to the fact that tae-in is still a high school student.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
that were in
you were probably
they were delicious
and so cold
i like this poem now.
i still don't really get it.
i still like it.
i remember freshman year my teacher Ms. Sarles made us read this poem and I thought it was so stupid (I also thought she was so stupid... my reasons being she described "Happiness" as "being happy" [which i'm not sure if this memory is true or made up] and she said "ironical" which I used to think wasn't a word. ... it is. and happiness as "being happy" seems perfectly reasonable to me now.. plus i notice that i sometimes adopt her ditzy way of talking at times. i guess it comes with the age. looking back it was her first year teaching and i DO use things that she taught. sorry Ms. Sarles for being mean and bad and calling you a racist.) ... -_-
I wondered in the MRT, why I get teary.
Perhaps the idea of people learning gratitude makes my heart ache a little.
When I was little I prided myself in being a rock. I didn´t cry. I looked down on my mom´s constant crying (praying, movies, talking, sharing) and I was definitely uncomfortable when others cried.
I cried only in movie theaters in that safe haven of dark and make believe.
Now, I tear up a lot. Maybe I'm more my mom than I thought; or I guess tears don't equal weakness to me anymore.
Watched Becoming Jane last night. Felt so hopeless and helpless for Jane Austen... yet also drawn to her situation. I always like to imagine myself in the heroine's shoes (provided she's a heroine i admire).
I think the reason that Christian fiction fails is because they are usually stories with the supernatural element of God. Yet, why read make believe when you can read truth? For every Christian romantic novel out there, you have five real stories of how so and so met their true love. For every adventure Christian novel out there, you can get a bunch of memoirs and biographies of true wars and daring escapades and displays of human weakness and dependence on a God of strength.
That's why I think for Christian books to succeed they need to be very allegorical and fanciful. Plus those are just the best.
I was reading a correspondence between a friend and i a few months ago and was just kicking myself in the foot over how he listened to me and responded in a way that was kind to my nonsensical ranting despite his mindset being completely different from mine. And yet during "his turn" I was so quick to judge and teach instead of listening and loving. I wish i hadn't done that.
Friday, December 11, 2009
The sweet thing was watching them talk and chat and chill and translate parts that the other girls couldn't understand. It's just very sweet. That's also why I wanted to show it after school; so that it wasn't a school-sanctioned event and the kids could chill. I wish I could have sat with them but I was busy finishing 2nd quarter grades.
Anyway, I was thinking, how even just a 2 year difference between my sister and I and I feel so helpless as to help her.
As I watch "Hello My Teacher" I swoon over Gong Yoo. And then I think about Kwon Sang woo (my first kdrama love) and how old he's gotten... and i think that as I grow older, I'll be past this whole youthful stage... I won't even look youthful anymore and truth be told, that makes me sad. (in Taiwan i realize how VAIN i am and how VAIN i always WAS.. lovely my worst faults are pride, unsubmission and vanity...why couldn't it have been like.. shyness, being a pushover, and trusting people too much?)
Anyway as I was watching "Hello My Teacher", Na BoRi expresses regret about how she treated her student just the way her old teachers treated her (unjustly).. it got me thinking, how even now, I get angry at my students, or call out one (out of impatience) when others are in trouble. And I'm doing stuff that I hated when I was young .... but then I also think it goes both ways.. how.. how we don't listen when we're young to people who are old. SO I WANT to write and tell myself when i'm OLDER to remember what it was like to be young and also to remind my future kids that i was young too.
it's so hard to get kids to listen..to see beyond the now. sometimes it seems futile.
but i'm easily inspired...i suppose the rest of my life will be spent depending on HIM so we'll see :-)
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
- how in HS u have a sense of justice.
- after Jake K got away with cheating in math all the time and then going to stanford, never thought lightly of cheating again.
- blah blah blah.
- don't give them an opportunity to cheat
- if they do make them re-do the test
Our school demographics
- ESL .. all of them. even if they're okay at it.
- suck at writing.
- don't understand WHY we quote things etc.
- dean/supervisors don't give satisfactory reasons since they get confused with modern ideas of intellectual property etc.
- i have lots of ESL kids
- what i realized this quarter is if you bring up a problem it is up to YOU to solve it
- resulted in me emailing a parent every other night, giving the student heads ups 2 weeks in advance, providing lost/missed work over and over again... all so he could barely pull in a D- because he has a bad attitude, has ADHD, and thus never pays attn in class and has to make up classwork at home and needs to do missing hw etc. behavioral issues as well. did i mention awful attitude?
-- sooo i'm reluctant right now.. because i know for sure another student did NOT write his work. And it frustrates me to NO end because he IS ESL. HE KNOWS. WRITE me a sucky paper I don't CARE. just do it in YOUR own words! ... I hinted but.. it didn't work... he showed me his work again on the computer, and i told him he spelled "lives" wrong.. and he wrote "lif" .. -_- .. SOO for SURe a perfect paper that flows PERFECTLY cannOT have been written by you; probably by your older sister who is known to be a genius at our school. ...
and basically grades are due this friday. and if i bring this up with him, he will have to re-write it. I will have to be there to watch him and make sure he does.
I'm tempted to accept it since I didn't catch him and our school actually (although tacitly) seems to FROWN on catching... so i have to be slick..b ut OH how much EASIER it would be to just ACCEPT it, give him an A.. he's not going to pass anyway, why not just..
If anything, i see fear of man here.. I so desperately want the stupid students to like me.. and yet I can't even tell them directly to their FACES that they need to be quiet. If a student protests my reprimand, I back down right away... or laugh it off.
I can't believe i FEAR little kids! and then I puff up as soon as they like me.
This week was difficult. In light of my review last week and noticing how the 8th graders aren't quiet and how the 7th graders are.. but... i don't know.
Psalm 139: <3
Saturday, December 5, 2009
cutesy pose: okay fine.
little pucker: a little border line.
lip gloss and eye liner? NO
greasy part in the middle/shaggy hair do a la Snape? DOUBLE NO
at least this time you're not wearing a deep v-neck or anything too girly.
I don't hate Jang Geunseok or anything, and i like his characters etc, but i feel like there's a line between metro-hot and ... uhh.. whatever he's pulling.
and i know no one from dramabeans reads this, but seriously, having girls clamor all over this dude.. i gotta rant somewhere!
this was a fun read because
* interesting points
* well read/informed/researched
* interesting, plausible readings of the text
* not the normal blah blah psychosocio musings of why people like Twilight.
I almost regret not publicizing my thoughts about Twilight in a coherent manner just to say "What you're writing is NOT NEW!" to all those twilight critics out there.
oh well, they write it better/more concisely/humorously than i do.
anyway, ultimately, lately, i've been anti-Twilight.
It's fun to like the characters, it's fun.. but i think for me, I was just really profoundly affected when I first read the four books. (I actually physically got sick from not sleeping and my grades fell). and then let us NOT get into the emo-ness. LOVED the phone talks with beth tho.
Anyway, I see my 8th graders devouring those books, gushing over Taylor Lautner and stuff, and honestly I really don't like Twilight anymore.
It's one thing to eat ice-cream for lunch for a week; it's a totally different thing when you feed that to your kids.
Not that my students are my kids, but I just don't want them to get the wrong idea, to get messed up by idealizations from books, and to read the CRAP that's in there too (like the 4th book is way too inappropriate for middle school kids.. and come to think of it, maybe it's too inappropriate for older girls like me too..)
Anyway, i hope this is my last twilight-related post.
so embarrassing and lame that i know this.
but for me, i acknowledge it as an entertaining series.. what i don't like is when people blindly LOVE it.. because there is just so much wrong with it. i'm glad other blogs/magazines have pointed them out.
for now, i'll just post links instead of writing something substantial on my own.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Anyway i told him this is my first year teaching and I'd be open to feedback, just b/c i know on his part it must be awkward to criticize a fiery teacher.
Funny thing is that today my kids were better behaved.
Anyway, the FUNNY thing is that what irks me is how he mentioned that the kids might not respect me. I think that sort of rankles.
Pros were he could tell I knew what I was talking about, he was glad I was using certain terms with the children..
i mean there wasn't anything bad that he said; except that maybe the kids didn't respect me.. and that really does sort of sting because out of ANYTHING that's what I want/expect from the kids...
but you know what?
I like the way my reading classroom is relaxed. I like the camaraderie I have with them.
And maybe if that doesn't look like respect, unless it gets so that kids are saying "Hey you" to me and not thanking me or raising their hands... I think I'm okay with that.
i did find out what it means to me. hahah. r e s p e c t.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
I think this backdrop is important so that we see this issue in relation to the larger issues. Too many defenses of the signers of the MD err precisely by seeing only this document, not the larger questions on the table and trends at work. Once ecumenism has been embraced, common ground becomes the goal. That almost without fail means that differences are minimized or dismissed altogether. Perceived piety or devotion to good works gradually trump soundness on the gospel as the evidence of genuine Christianity. That seems like the only way to explain how Packer can claim that Teresa is a model Christian because “what one does for others is the real test of the genuineness and depth of one’s love to God, and specifically to Jesus Christ the Lord” (p. 262).
As I said earlier on this subject, the Manhattan Declaration represents another step toward accepting the false notion that being a Christian is demonstrated by doing something about social issues. It seems clear to me that J. I. Packer has taken that step."
ecumenism is attractive to me. a desire to be friends with everyone (people pleasing), a desire for social justice (perhaps stronger than a desire for personal piety and holiness a la James 1) makes the perfect formula for a wish for "why can't we just all get along?"
but, i'm also really stubborn and i don't like to be self-contradictory, and it doesn't make sense for me, to "hold hands and kumbaya" with people who don't hold to the same core views. If we have different reasons for wanting the same outcome, it's bound to turn out like a man on two horses. The horses might run together for a while, and he'll look really cool, but one horse is bound to turn one way or another and the man will fall; or even worse, the horses will approach a tree and the horses will naturally swerve to avoid the tree and the man will slam into the tree. It's bound to happen - at least it does in cartoons anyway.
the point of this is just to say, i wish, but i understand why not. and perhaps this is a good time to understand this as many of my friends go onto humanitarian efforts... just because we both seek relief for the downtrodden, doesn't mean we do so with the same motives or even that we can cooperate together beyond a certain superficial point.
i feel regretful, but it's only surface regret. i think right underneath that little crust, i know what i know.. but i want to at least acknowledge that it's not a single, determined, ignoring-all-other-options knowledge.
in other news. it makes sense that true Christians would have the gift of literacy... since true Christians want the Word and since the Bible isn't easy literature, people are naturally going to get better at expressing themselves and understanding. Furthermore, I think logic also gets a boost since we're not as blinded by sin. Really! Does this sound bigoted? I hope not. I KNOW there are plenty of non-Christian geniuses with great literacy. .. but there's also a lot of not-smart Christians, who for some reason can write or speak beautifully, logically, simply, or clearly.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
if i were a grandmother by then, agae 55, it will be fun! :] no pressure at all!!! i mean it! God makes alll things beautiful for us all!
just start praying and asking God for the direction and hear from him then He always makes our path straight!
so much in the email to laugh at.
first of all the spelling and stuff.. she's actually good. i'm surprised at her random punctuations....
i like how she gives me a hint; then says no pressure; then slightly implies that i :"just" need to "start praying and asking God for direction" ... perhaps my path is not straight right now? hahaha.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
I'm excited and happy for them, I feel a pang of regret for one of my youth leaders and hope she gets married sooooon...
Facebook is a double-edged sword, since I get to keep in touch with people from the past, but I also get to see beyond the church-facade they displayed at church. In one sense it makes me feel sick and again, grateful to have been saved from that church culture of hypocrisy, where you worship God on Sundays while working over the Saturday hangover.
And then, I feel incredibly superior and legalistic... like "how dare you get drunk." Of COURSE getting drunk is a sin, but my issue is that my attitude is incredibly hoity-toity... and I feel really low and let down by seeing old sunday school teachers with pictures like that, or even seeing captions like "girls .. blah blah blah". In my head I frown and thing "you're not a girl, you're an old woman, grow up."
It's rather all really mean in my head.
I guess, again, I need to take people off their pedestals.. and not expect them to be somebody just because they led things.. and I'm thankful for older teachers who were faithful to the Lord first and didn't just do an act for Sunday.
I'm thankful for a church now where people straightforwardly and unabashedly love the Lord and understand worldliness for what it is.. instead of explaining it away, they admit struggles and work to find the balance between liberty and edification.
Also.. the REAL reason for this post... (so random, I can't believe I got carried away with the abovE)........... it's sort of scary to see my sunday school teachers getting engaged now.. because.. PLEASE, I don't want to be getting engaged 10-15 years from now. :-( :-( :-(
i don't think i normally say things publicly about marriage etc, so that will be it. BUT surriously; maybe it will be some sort of humbling season God will put me through because i'm so chockfull of pride.. but... yagh. even if it means i'd have the means for some crazy extravagant wedding (like one of my teachers).. i'd rather not marry a guy who's pushing 40 when i'm in my mid 30s. That's all.
This week especially I saw a lot of pharisaism in my life (pharisaic-ism hehe) and it sucked. I'm really that pharisee that stands and says "Oh God, I'm SO glad I'm not like THAT sinner over THERE."
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
and when i helped add butter underneath its skin, i felt like i was touching a wrinkly old woman. but i liked that. :-)
i remember that's when i got chronicles of Narnia. I began reading The Magician's Nephew in fourth grade and grew so bored of it.. it was stinky and boring. I think I tried to reread it a few times.. maybe in 6th grade I really got into the chronicles... perhaps I began with the second book or something.
I remember the boxed set illustrations always intrigued me; it had a picture of the unicorn from the Last battle. there was a gold chain around its beautiful white neck with some blood on the tip of its horn. chilling and beautiful. at least to a child's eyes.
i remember alllll my boxcar children books from that.. i remember wanting to join the bookclub where if you paid 4.99 a month, you'd get a special book a month and some sort of special toy.
I think i got all the Dear America diaries thru Scholastic book Club. I LOVED those books. They were more expensive - 9.99 each I think. I remember once my sister and I surveyed our collection and realized we had over $100 worth of Dear America books!
we also had a buttload of American Girl books too. Addie. Samantha. Kirsten. and of course Felicity. Who could forget her? Forget all the rest of the American Girl books... these were the OG.
those yellowing, colored newsprint catalogues. <3 and then the book fairs, where when you were in 5th grade, you were allowed to "volunteer," I loved book club.
I loved my school library, and the librarian, Mrs. Kay Cook. her name was Kay Cook! When we went to the library, she would read to us a story, then we would pick a book to check out. my mom used to pick us up late, so my sister and I would wait in the library and read. I'd sit in the far left corner where all the mythology was. I think that's where most of my mythology knowledge is from (except for the weird specific stuff I got in college). I think that's also where chinese mythology was kept too.
I remember reading stories of oranges, of a girl whose asian mother and american father fell in love in Asia and the father learned how to use chopsticks and the woman made a nest of mashed potatoes and put peas on it like eggs in a nest, but found that was only a british custom.
Fun b/c we made four and we did everything together.
Went by really fast and it was good!
Got the recipe from smitten kitchen
i love smitten kitchen apple recipes.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
I had mixed feelings about this year's top chef. Basically it was a yawn; especially compared to the drama and motely crew of personalities last season (come on, i still remember their names; Jamie, Carla, Stefan, the italian guy, leah and the meathead that actually won's fling, the older lady who i LOVED but obviously my love proved fickle since i can't remember her name... the older one.. i used her skate/cauliflower puree recipe once ... man her name is on the tip of my mind.. Dinah? no.. Dionne? something a little exotic i remember.. ARIANE!)
and this season, it was boring for a few reasons. To name the main reason, in my opinion it was way too technical. In the past part of the appeal was that you could see why chefs went home or stayed while also nursing the secret fantasy that maybe, just maybe if you got your act together, you could also go on to star and if not win, at least give Bravo a good run for its money. Not anymore. The culinary chemistry and gourmet chefs are no longer an exception but the rule. I mean we have Brian and his cocky brother (Michael! i forgot his name at first) who are both okay on the eyes, fabulous in technical skills and apparently whip it together to produce great food. The thing is, they never mess up; if they do, it's something lame like "oops, forgot my extra garnish"... nothing quite as cataclysmic as say, a dessert not setting or all your food going bad because the refrigerator was left open (i think this was last season too. WOW season 5! it was that wide-eyed indian girl i think). Sure Bravo tried to milk the whole sibling rivalry thing, but whatever; if we were interested in that sort of reality show, we'd go to MTV.
Not only is there Brian and Michael, there's also Jennifer. Perfect little Jennifer who is that girl in school that nobody likes. The focused one, who never smiles, who says all the right things, who does all the right things, who did all the right things, and who will probably continue to do so until she smoothly slides in and wins and nods and smiles. Lame. Yet perfect little Jennifer did throw us a twist; when she literally CRACKED. So glad there were so many incompetent chefs to eliminate before the judges got a chance to eliminate her. LOVED it during this episode when Padma smiles and coolly said, "Welcome back" after the quickfire. still, Jennifer's intense.
So not only do we have three super technically talented professionally trained chefs winning every quickfire and elimination challenge (i swear, in the beginning it was a pingpong match between the.. three), but everyone else is just... bumbling or boring. This season seemed to say, if you have no professional training, go home - you suck! which was pretty much the case for most of them.
Of course there were some interesting characters, and i'll get into the ones who stuck out.
Of course Mike: is cocky.. super cocky.. and annoying.. because he's so cocky. i can totally see him as a dad. a self-important dad of course.
then there's ooh what's that french dude. Martel? Milan? Jacque? hahahah whatever.. He was just cute. with zee fwench accent. too bad he couldn't cook for beans... or beans.
and also, just most of the people were just really self-deprecating, had self esteem issues, or tried to be really gay to stand out.. lame. Bravo should stop trying to be a platform for human-interest issues. it's about the cooking.
I think towards the end, though, Bravo wisened up and began trying to appeal to its average majority.. through the comfortable home cooking of Kevin.. gotta love him and his beard.. and then his little bald head that makes it look like he's wearing a yarmulke. Sort of reminds me of a dwarf! DUDE so wanna eat his meat though..... wow. hahaha. poor guy; he won't win.. unless others pull booboos. They also began focusing on Eli. The dreamer, aspiring chef, TV watchers can all empathize with Eli. trying new things, young to the scene. whee. Except.. peanut butter jelly .. .whatever monster concoction that was during last week's episode.. was horrific Eli ... good thing robin was still around.
Concerning Robin; was she there to appeal to the older demographic? Because they did an awful job of making her appealing. It was a little funny to see everyone sort of get irked by her, and i guess she is very talkative and a little too .. wannabe. BUT again, Bravo, this is a cooking show; not MTV.. not Disney. Come on, super petty. I think she was kept there to be the annoying factor to add fire to a collection of dull duds.
I like Brian though. He is just a likeable guy; especially in juxtaposition to his immature brother Michael... who probably seethes under the shadow of his perfect brother. Brian is so ... under-spoken about his talents, he's just very methodological, kind, has a sense of morals, humble.. he's a bore. I'm surprised he became a chef. but he's pretty dang good at it! and it's a fresh of breath air.. whoa there, breath of fresh air, to see a nice human being on TV. Poor Michael. Michael is a normal human being... and it must suck to not measure up to your older brother. Michael - you're a great chef too. Just stop acting spoiled or cocky.. but I guess that's applauded on Tv.. since you're sticking to your guns. Then in that case, stick to your guns.. not that you'd care about my blog post anyway...
Final comments: on the judges; every year I feel a pang of symapthy for the other girl judge.. the one who's not padma.... because HONESTLY, you know people are comparing you two, and Padma's beautiful. HA that's my sick, superficial side coming out. see i dont even know her name. if i didnt know any of the names it would be the bald judge, the hot judge, and the not as pretty judge. hahah actually no, it would be Tom, Padma and the other one. HAHAHAHAHA
And Toby isn't so caustic this year... glad that he left his weirdo analogies for.. whatever, not the dinner table.
In closing, the final four has been decided! You know, last season, the ending was pretty anticlimactic; and boy did i not like the winner.. and you know what's funny, nobody even sees him around anymore. ANYWAY it was kinda sad to see Eli go.. since Eli was pretty chills... but meh, didn't care much for him or anything.. ultimately despite the length of this rambling post, i didn't care much for most of them, really. i don't even remember half the ones who left.
the chefs in that stupid little top chef alumni reunion special they had (instead of a cooking episode that i wanted to see!) left more of an impression on me than this whole season. well, i'll always be interested in Jennifer's food........
Also location this season was pretty sweet. Las Vegas .. then Napa Valley? wooo!! The money themes were pretty crazy and man, M Resort was just showering the chefs with money.
I still haven't gotten to eat at Jamie's restaurant, Absinthe.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
"What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes." - James 4:14
"Instead, you ought to say, 'If the Lord wills, we will live and also do this or that.' " - James 4:15
"I waste away; I will not live forever. Leave me alone, for my days are but a breath." - Job 7:16
""If I should wash myself with snow / And cleanse my hands with lye, / Yet You would plunge me into the pit, / And my own clothes would abhor me. / For He is not a man as I am that I may answer Him, / That we may go to court together. / There is no umpire between us, / Who may lay his hand upon us both. " - Job 9:30-33
""Behold, You have made my days as handbreadths, And my lifetime as nothing in Your sight; Surely every man at his best is a mere breath. Selah." - Psalm 39:5
"And now, Lord, for what do I wait? / My hope is in You. / Deliver me from all my transgressions; / Make me not the reproach of the foolish. " - Psa 39:7-8
"Man is like a mere breath; His days are like a passing shadow." - Psalm 144:4
"Stretch forth Your hand from on high; / Rescue me and deliver me out of great waters, / Out of the hand of aliens / ... / I will sing a new song to You, O God; / Upon a harp of ten strings I will sing praises to You, / Who gives salvation to kings, / Who rescues David His servant from the evil sword. / Rescue me and deliver me out of the hand of aliens," Psalm 144:7, 9-11
Reuven's father comes to understand that life itself is short. That importance does not lie in life itself but the human being, the soul, that inhabits that life. Yet as a result of this premise, he assumes that he must DO.
It is true that life is transient and that it is the being that matters more than the life; the soul prevails over breath. And yet because of that we must praise Him who gave life; how can we repay; how can we earn; how can we MAKE our lives worthwhile when we had no hand in its creation in the first place? We cannot simply walk up to the giver of life, we cannot assume that we can make our lives worthy... and for that I am so very thankful and relieved.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
"Thanksgiving has lost its cultural muscle," writes Eric Felton in aWall Street Journal commentary today. He adds, "The early advent of the Santa season may have less to do with the red-and-green imperative than with the weakness of Turkey Day."
His assessment of the state of Thanksgiving in the 21st century is worth reading:
Could it be we've lost our capacity for gratitude? A successful harvest occasioned thanks back when it was all that stood between us and a long, cold, hungry winter. But now we're divorced from the seasonal rhythms of the farm, where the harvest is celebrated as the payoff of all the year's labors. Even in the midst of this Great Repression we enjoy perpetual plenty. What resonance does a cornucopia have to people who have come to expect ripe blackberries in February? If anything, we should be more grateful, but that's not our nature. Anything we struggle for, we hold dear; anything that comes easy, we take for granted.
He goes on to capture the awkwardness of trying to enjoy a family feast when some of those around the table just want to moralize about the food:
Not only don't we celebrate the astonishing abundance that is our good fortune, we whine and moan about how it makes us fat.... And if that weren't enough to squeeze the pleasure from the day, no modern Thanksgiving is complete without a college student home from school, lecturing the family on the cruelty of meat. (To which the only appropriate response is: "Does that mean you don't want the drumstick?")
He ends with an invitation to enjoy a little more of the goodness of autumn and Thanksgiving before diving into Christmas:
... before we break out the ornaments and dust off the Vince Guaraldi soundtrack, let's make the most of autumn and its particular pleasures. Jump in a pile of leaves. Savor the waning daylight. And go ahead. Week after next, eat that second slice of pumpkin pie—just be thankful for it."
Friday, November 13, 2009
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Friday, November 6, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
So last night i set the alarm for 5:55am to go swimming.
Monday, October 26, 2009
I don't know; maybe it's this new generation or the Taiwan culture, but whatever happened to coming to school on time or simple cutting and accepting your fate as a truant?
Friday, October 16, 2009
Rated: Prep Time: 15 Minutes Ready In: 55 Minutes Submitted By: PANTHERA Cook Time: 12 Minutes Servings: 42 1. Preheat the oven to 325 degrees F (165 degrees C). 2. In a large bowl, cream together the butter, brown sugar, and white sugar until smooth. Beat in eggs one at a time, then stir in vanilla. Combine the flour, baking soda, and salt; stir into the creamed mixture until just blended. Mix in the quick oats, walnuts, and chocolate chips. Drop by heaping spoonfuls onto ungreased baking sheets. 3. Bake for 12 minutes in the preheated oven. Allow cookies to cool on baking sheet for 5 minutes before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely.
Made a bunch for the students today to celebrate end of first quarter.
I'm just sad I made them so small :-/
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
I am going to apply for the UCI terminal Master’s in English program for Summer 2010.
Perhaps maybe even to Stanford’s STEP program.
Maybe even a longshot and apply for Berkeley English PhD. (ha. yah right)
Examine my heart and maaayyyyybe oxford/cambridge English masters. (but that’s a secret / don’t tell my parents b/c they’ll be way too excited and I am not sure if I would apply).
Taiwanese GRE red tape: It’s a split-test process and they offer the computer part many times a year, but the written part is only offered 2x a year - October and June.
Plus the subject exam is only offered 2x more this year. I missed the November registration deadline, but the admissions contact told me I could take the April one. April 12th. I don’t know if I’ll be in the USA or.. in Asia then. …
I e-mailed the admissions btw. it was a ridiculous email.. basically “can i not take the GRE?” he was like “uh GRE is the basic standard for your application” i kind of knew that was coming. especially when Selina was all “Uh it’s like the SATs.. you can’t apply to college without the SATs!”
So what I’m planning right now is either to take the split test Taiwan GRE and turn in the second part super late (I *may* be admitted on a provisional basis) but right now I’m looking at Japan and Thailand … … yeah, I’m going to one of those countries for ONE weekend to take a test and then come home .. woo. … .. -_-
Sunday, October 11, 2009
I love having talented students in my class. Er scratch that. I love having students with ambition. Not “ambitious students” but students who like to do certain things and are fine with it.
And obviously, when their interests coincide with mine, I geng adore them. HAHa. ew mixing chinese and french = yuck.
A is trying to write a book and her friend A is artsy and creates cool fonts when she writes (love it love it!) anyway, tis typical middle school fare, but still, it’s cute to read their notes. HAHA (it’s their fault! they should think twice before writing notes in class … especially in their CLASS NOTEBOOKS!)
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Don't take too long to think about it. Fifteen books you've read that will always stick with you. First fifteen you can recall in no more than 15 minutes. Tag 15 friends, including me because I'm interested in seeing what books you choose.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your blessings, see what God hath done!
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your many blessings, see what God hath done!
When you look at others with their lands and gold,
Think that Christ has promised you His wealth untold;
Count your many blessings. Wealth can never buy
Your reward in heaven, nor your home on high.
Are you ever burdened with a load of care?
Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
Count your many blessings, every doubt will fly,
And you will keep singing as the days go by.
So, amid the conflict whether great or small,
Do not be disheartened, God is over all;
Count your many blessings, angels will attend,
Help and comfort give you to your journey's end.