Tuesday, September 28, 2010


““The egg is on the table.””

a student had to give an example of a declarative sentence. i just find this so funny…. b/c it’s so RANDOM. why an egg? why on a table? why?

Monday, September 27, 2010

top chef finale 8

what the heck?
i thought Kevin was mexican.


Ed's personality sort of shifted towards the end :-(

Glad Angelo didn't win..... but i hope he doesnt blame being sick.

sad tiffany didn't make it to the finals.

totally liked that dude 

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Why I like to watch Kim Sun Ah Act

- her roles are always quirky
- she’s entertaining
- despite her eccentric characters and their loudmouthed, strong willed, weirdo ways, she always gets the BEST guy
- she can be so vulnerable on-screen, it’s amazing.
- although i disagree, people think this woman is attractive
- she has a majestic air about her in the way she carries herself
- her eyes and her round face reminds me of my mom
… i get annoyed at her screeching and her babytalk though. but every actor has his/her faults so yeah

-maybe in a little way i see myself in every character she plays…. secretly wishfully living vicariously.  .. yeh.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

"You can't start a charity off of charity." - My dad

My dad's candid response to my dreamy monologue of how I wanted to start a self-supporting school in Bangledesh.

It was okay; I wasn't crushed.  It was just a little dose of reality and a reminder to take a step back from huge ideas and start with step one.

Sadly, I realized step one was a very, very teeny step, and despite what I thought were "good credentials," the current economic situation and my late start in the game, even that little step was barely toeing the line.

I'm going to keep thinking of huge ideas, of feats I can accomplish twenty years from now (even though I don't know where I would be then).  Maybe someone else will take these ideas off my hands and do it him/herself.  Maybe just my thinking about this and writing about this will cause someone else to do something totally different.  I don't mind being a catalyst.

Maybe nothing will come of all of this.  Maybe this will all be a nice, but futile writing exercise.  (Maybe right now I'm feeling incredibly doubtful and am thinking I need to gain more experiences and work under my belt until I apply for schools because my mind is whirring because starbucks is playing "LA Woman" by the Doors and the music is messing with my already slightly feverish mind!!!!!!!!!!!)

We'll see.

As for now, I'll be recording my steps, ideal future steps, (possibly many) stumbles, and you know, those rare occasions of success.

So i'm going to do it.

Right now I can't figure out a blog name for the blog that I'm going to use to....
* summarize/discuss articles/movies/other media that discuss education issues
* write individual posts of "brilliant ideas"
* document my own process of applying/volunteering
* write my own reasons/thoughts/anecdotes/background information about me + figures of education
* be as idealistic as i want!

The purpose of this blog would be to
* help me keep an organized track of everything going on in my head  (blog tags FTW  <-- ooh did i use that right?)
* inspire people (i think my over the top ideas help catalyze more moderate, doable ideas)
* hopefully garner positive publicity for a future school?

Future difficulties
* I don't like blogging in a structured manner.

Idears I had:
The Mind Garden  (b/c it was a suggestion for JChun's tutoring center; b/c I feel like a name should also be thematic to the focus / feel of the whole place.  Like is it a place to CULTIVATE minds?  PRUNE them?  PLANT SEEDS?  ... JChun said it sounded like a hippie psycho shymcho)

Mees Keem (to point to my past/first experience as a teacher)

Teaching Fishing  (you know the whole "if you teach a man to fish. blah blah blah")

Lofty Aspirations; Modest Goals  (boring!)

Shoot for the stars (trite)

The Snark?  (like my writing style.. if i decide to be snarky, AND point to LC's elusive Snark as a metaphor pointing to the elusive grasp for the right education?)

For now, i'll just write my posts here, and later copy it over to the other one.. once it's made.

I'm thinking of using WordPress instead of Blogspot.

I know most of you guys are silent stalkers, but... PLEASE COMMENT.  (and in the future; in the new blog, I WILL NEED COMMENTS HAHAHAHHAHAHA)

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

What Happens in MN Stays in MN.

Yeah right.

Day 1:
Mom drove me to SF airport for 7:25am take off.
Stopped by So Cal to pick up more passengers (wtheck, airplanes are like busses now?)... and a BUNCH of USC people got on.  a lot of OLD people wearing USC gear saying "Fight on" to random other USC people they saw... they were like all old.  I was wondering if there was some.. USC reunion for Minnesotans..
Transferred in Denver, Colorado
Finally landed in Minneapolis/St. Paul, MN
Early bc no checked bags!
Called Go Direct  and I got to leave on an earlier shuttle.  Hooray!
Leona found me at St. Mary's Mayo Clinic.
We went home and snacked on veggie chips and made a quick dinner and waited for Dr. Han.
Who came home oh so late :( :(
It's okay!  We went for walks and talked and such!  She showed me around.. and I got to take the Junia Suite in Chez Han. :)
we also soaked oxtails..

Day 2:
Woke up bright and semi-early (okay not really), and after starting up the oxtail soup,
hit up Daube's bakery
then onto Harmony, MN for a tour  of Amish town!  Which turned out not to be a town really, but more of scattered settlements...  Leona aptly said it reminded her of her China tours where they basically take you from store to store in hopes that you'll buy from them.  hehe.
then.. an impromptu trip to IOWA!  (the border was only 3 miles away. how could I resist?)
Now if people ask me if I've been to Iowa, i can say .... YES!
stopped by at home to check on the oxtail soup (and to bathroom)
Went to downtown Rochester and waited for James! Who gave us a quick tour of the Mayo clinic.
We went to Chester's  for my birthday dinner (aww shucks guys!)
Then came home and checked on the oxtail soup.
Maybe went on a walk?
Leo and I ended up watching Bright Star,  which I wouldn't recommend for the casual moviegoer.    (before we watched, I made her read "Bright Star" and we did a quick analysis. HAHAHHA)
well, james was with us, but 5 minutes into the movie, he conked out. and randomly twitched. hehehe.

Day 3
Woke up late and mosied on over back up to Saskeetow?  Or some random named town near the Twin Cities... to hit up
Afterwards we went to Mall of America (biggest mall in the world) and hit up TWO rides at Nickelodian (sp?) Universe.  They were FUN.  especially the second ride.. i almost peed my pants it was so good!
James treated us to starbucks and unfortunately, my first pumpkin latte of the season was not that great.
Then came home and cut up watermelon...

Day 4
Church !  at Calvary Evangelical Free Church.  
Okay, I really loved it here.  I really really did.  And afterwards we went to a welcome/history of church/what we believe session (which is sort of like a pre-lim to membership) ..
  I was glad that I got to learn more about the Evangelical Free Churches and also about this church, and I was yeah, .. seriously, it's awesome to connect with believers anywhere you go.  They have a LOT of cool community outreaches here.  The pastor who was leading this was really careful in explaining things and just so nice and gracious and his wife (second wife: both of their spouses passed away) was really outgoing and friendly and a go-getter.  Anyway, I can't wait til my church gets bigger and has a varied age group etc etc.   EXCITING/excited for Leo/James.
then cheeeled .. read books, researched/began school apps...  James came in and out and procrastinated his essay by complaining that he was hungry.
then we went to Newt's where we et some fATTY burgers.
then James gave me a tour of the richer/older neighborhood and we played in a park.  (and even in Rochester, kids go to parks to smoke le veed!)
then came home, cheeled some more, and then Leo and I watched Romy and Michele's High School Reunion.   then looked up more awkward dance clips (where we ended up watching the ending of Never Been Kissed. GAh they just don't make chick flicks like that nowadays, and the A-Ha's music video , and the BeeGees' music vids )
then ... ahem, we tried to learn the staying alive dance. .. then James came out and we tried to get him to do the final dance with us.  Hahahhahaha.  I can't divulge any more information but all I can say is Leona has an awesome husband.    (we should've done THAt dance at the wedding)
then we all three went on a walk with a frisbee.  .. and came home.
Then Leo and i took random pictures... and. .. went to bed. :(

Day 5:
woke up super early.
Leo drove me to the airport
I slept and slept until Phoenix, Arizona
Then waited there for 2 hours until i landed in SJ, CA.
where parents+joy and I went to get jjajjangmyung, jjambbong, and tangsuyook.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

How I make decisions...

Grace: what time are you planning on leaving?

me: mmm what time is it?


hmm 5?

im thinking of going to costco


acutally no

no tengo dinero

DArn it >;O

i wanted to buy samgyupsal


but thats unnecessary

as are the apples

and the marshmallows are unnecessary too

i'll just get that next time.. b/c it's only a 50NT discount anyway



getting me to go to csotco just for 50NT

... wow.. that was like.. a monologue

Monday, September 20, 2010

looked thru stanford gsb website and was sufficiently intimidated.
seriously. heart-poundingly freaked out.

i mean i have to include a resume for the ed program.. (along with other things).. and then on a whim, clicked the ma/mba dual program.

now i don't think i'll get in ANYWHERE.

why did i squander my undergrad education?

it's okay.

i don't need this.
i'll try anyway.


(just wanted to say though, INTIMIDATED THOROUGHLY! FOR SURE!)

"I wish i could be carelessly brilliant" - leona (from reading Ender's Game)

my ideas

once in 8th grade i read a boy's extensive 'opendiary.com' post on his "great" business proposal.. called like one-bite pizza, where basically the premise is they'd sell a pizza with the first bite gone.. and things would go like "uh oh, (if they got a whole one), here ya go!" and then take a bite.  something like that. and when it got big they'd have like pizza-cutters shaped with a bite so that they could just take out bites mass-styles.
I forget why he thought it'd be a good idea.
Honestly, well, obviously, I'm kinda sold on that idea since I still remember it (and remember who said it) a decade later.

I have some cool ideas.

Like my Nakery.  Where the little catch phrase would be "Naked and Unashamed" and where people would say things like "that's SO nake!"  and my cookies and muffins and breads would be bare and stripped and NOT full of preservatives/frosting.

Leona thought of titling an Asian-fusion restaurant "Disoriented."  I think that would be cuuuute.  I think the name would work for like a small cart, or something like that. It would be fun to run.

Another idea I had was changing my phone ring tone to the song from Inception that warns you of an impending kick. You could have it as your alarm, and it would be a trippy way to wake up.  THEN also, you know how when a sound like your alarm goes off during the day, you - for a split second - think that it's time to wake up?  Well, you'd have that effect DOUBLED since it would also be the sign that your dream is up.

Talking of Inception, my friend Sarah had a really smart idea.. (a while ago - but one that I remember now) .. perhaps the Inception was actually run by that girl on Leo Dicap's character..  it makes more sense.  there's MORE of a purpose with that.. because the whole inception for a business thing was kinda.. half-baked/not fully fleshed out.. and random.. and way too well done.  Anyway, one thing that bugs me about the ENDING is that either it's his dream OR it's the director's continuity error.  that bugs me.  it's REALLY not ambiguous .. it's one or the other.  and that bugs me. haha.  (let's talk if you have enlightened ideas).   Otherwise, I thought Inception was fun and riveting.  reminds me a LOT of Spanish philosophy/literature (they realllly love the whole zhuangzi's butterfly/dream theory)  ..  especially of Borges.

Inception's cool because there was a wide positive reception, it was trippy enough to get people thinking about it, but not enough to lose people. hehehe.

THE END!!!!!

i went with the Hans to their church.  Reallllllly excited about it. hehehe.  I can't wait for our church to be bigger/older/wider.  I don't know.  got excited about the future, and got excited about going home too.

Friday, September 17, 2010

Minnesota 1

"people go to Wisconsin for vacation," she added, "there's a place called the Dells."  I smiled politely.  "Like 'Farmer in the Dell'?"  She tried to look genuinely enthused; or maybe she actually was.  I could never really tell.

"I see."

"No, I hear it's great!"

We laughed.


My shuttle driver was so friendly on my way over.  I got off the plane much sooner than I expected, so the shuttle dude very accomodatingly sent the earlier van over to get me!  On the van, I learned that the roads in Minnesota are rough because of the extreme weathers..  Weather where you can use a frozen banana as a nail in the winter, and where you can fry an egg on the pavement in the summer.  Where the leaves turn into vibrant hues of red and gold in the Fall and where "you Californians" might freeze, but "us Minnesotans" can wear just about anything.

An elderly couple also got on; they were about one hour time difference away, and were here to get the husband's hip checked out at the Mayo clinic.  My shuttle driver was so enthusiastic about that place, regaling in tales of how they saved his leg, how they saved another friend's brain... pretty intense, pretty detailed, pretty true.  I snoozed in and out of the ride; opening my eyes to see fields of corn, rows of pine trees, a tossed mixture of winter and autumn swathed in a gauze of cold fog and cloud.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

heheheh Fresh of .. the Plane?

I asked my E* Reading Students to write me letters explaining a little about themselves and then why they're taking this class.

"My name is *** *** and I am very active and noisy girl.  I like hanging out with my friends and traveling.  I have two interesting facts.  One is that I can make dog or cat's crying sound very well.  When i am sad, I usually make that sound.  Second, I am a fob.....  ((Whoa there. hahaha))


She then talks about how she likes reading but has English problems in that she can speak it but not as well as other students.  She also wants to learn how to write a good essay since she "heard that essay is very important in America."

I like her concluding sentence especially:  "Fortunately, I am afraid of nothing because I am brand-new fob!"


Wednesday, September 8, 2010

i was on my friend's facebook when...

.. not to be a stalker or anything (okay fine, i am)... but DOESN'T SHE LOOK LIKE ME?  or at least the thumbnail.. i clicked on it, and yeah.. but yeah.  (for a sweet second i thought .. like "IS SOMEONE STEALING MY PICTURES???"!)

that's all.

an angry dream

okay, so before I begin, I must qualify this note with the fact that this is NOT the first of many dreams.  just i haven't had one for a while and this was uncommonly stressful.

don't remember much but a lot of us were in a church sanctuary for rehearsal.  I was obviously visiting or something, but also a teacher there.. and the rehearsals were supposed to end by 9:15pm, but it was 11:15pm when it ended.. and I was sooo frustrated.. and I remember certain acts.. like some guy reciting a poem.

Anyway, I visibly showed my irritation and snapped at ... wow, i am afraid of writing out her name, but you know, the one who must not be named, and responded to her innocent query of "what's the fuss? it's now over!" with a "yeah, but it should have been over 3 hours ago.  that's just inconsiderate!"  


I finally told her ! hahah.  okay. wow..  sad.  i woke up stressed and angry.  not a good way to start.  and dude, do you repent for your dreams?  i have so many sinful dreams.. where i act out sinful tendencies... and sometimes i wake up and go "whoa" but realize that i was sort of immobile during it, but other times, i consciously KNOW that i have a choice as to how i should respond/what i should say...  anyway, even in dreams, sometimes i sin, and sometimes i don't...  i guess it IS true then in Ephesians .... AHAHHAHHAHAH i just re-looked up Ephesians 2:3 and realized that what I read this morning as "by nature children of wrath, even at rest..." is actually "by nature children of wrath, even as the rest..."  HAHAHAHHAHA

Monday, September 6, 2010

Note: Concrete Times Are Probably Not Accurate

On Saturday after work, I boarded the Amtrak at 2:56pm and went to SLO (arrived at 7:15pm - transfer to a bus in San Jose)... where Sherie gave me her 1990 Honda Accord!  My first car that I actually own!  woo hoo.  The car has a lot of problems.  endearing.  (or frustrating).  for example.. the speedometer goes crazy, the "sports" sign flashes randomly, the radio sometimes works and doesn't work, and i should never roll down the back windows b/c they're on their last legs. Woo Hoo.  MY CAR IS OLDER THAN MY BROTHER! HaHAHAHA

Sunday: 9:45am: Left for the OC (for church and to pick up the rest of my stuff from Joy's).
- at one time we were climbing a hill and my car couldn't go past 50... i had to move waayyy over to the right lane pronto. haha. all the while pumping the gas pedal.
- got to church by 1:30pm.


8:45pm - finished loading most of my stuff and took a nap
10:15pm - woke up and loaded up surfboard.
realized that i had the stupid seatbelt that automatically slides up and down the side of the door so that it interfered with the belt thingie i had to hold my longboard in place on the roof of my car.
did the best i could, and left... with the seatbelt sound "ding"-ing persistently
i hoped that the beeping would stop
10:45pm - stopped by Peet's and bought a medium-sized coffee. the guy wished me a good night.  i did the same.
11:30ish pm - pulled over in LA because i could NOT STAND the constant alarm-like beeping of the seatbelt signal.  First filled up the gas tank (2.95/gal yo!) then time to tackle my longboard problem: I had already figured out what I was going to do... I closed the front doors, left the engine running (otherwise seatbelt thingie would move down and.. long story. basically, trust me, had to keep the engine running), rolled down the windows.. and attached the belt thingy through the windows... jumped back into my car through the driver side window... rolled up the windows and off we go!

Had a bad radio.. so constantly looked for songs to listen to
what the HECK is that song .. that tries to rhyme "blizzard" with.. "slizzard?"
played a game with myself of when i switch lanes, try to switch smoothly and avoid the little reflector bumps.  (if i bumped, i lost)
slowly went through all the books of the Bible and tried to find as many "parts" of it i knew chronologically (during the time my radio was searching for signals... turns out the antennae of my car is gone)

2:05am - noticed that the leash of my surfboard had come undone, so i looked for a place to pull over.
pulled over in this really scary deserted area with a box of empty beer bottles.
jumped out the window (had to leave engine running)
attached the leash to the actual surfboard rack.
then..... .... i had to pee..  and i couldn't go to a gas station (since i don't want to leave the car running while i'm getting gas... yes, moving the surfboard took a lot of pains). ... so... i just .. peed.  (thank you camping and Asia for teaching me how to squat pee.  no thank you stupid brain for peeing sideways on a slant, so that my right foot ended up being in a puddle.. of my pee.  no thank you coffee for making me need to pee.  thank you delirious brain for not caring that a bit of the cuff of my right pant leg was damp.. and thank you to my resourceful brain for quickly scuffling my feet around the dirt and then jumping back into the car.. this time with more finesse to avoid stepping on my seat)

sang along with songs.
made up my own songs.
sang American patriotic songs. (derno)
constantly fiddled with the radio.

3:50 pm:  noticed gas was way too low to make it home.  pulled into "last gas stop for next 16 miles"  .. a Shell station.  turned off the gas.  jumped out the window (b/c doors are tied shut due to surfboard rack)..  gas... 3.29/gal. :-( :-(   ... filled up.  jumped back in through the window (by now, quite adept at this..)  and drove out.. ready to get on the 152 West to 101 N!  Last time, i almost hit a wall.. b/c i didnt realize that there was a turn.. 152 is really scary actually.

anyway, i made it home by 5am... i was pretty wide awake.  especially during the second to last hour when i was on 152 West.. and it was ALL WINDY. and scary.  so that was good.

and now i'm wired.  wired wired WIRED!

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

the blob; chapter 1.

she clambered mindlessly to her room and swept the sundry items from her bed - absently yet gently - like the way she did everything.  she was settling down, adding a second pillow to her back, surveying her space littered with scattered belongings, when it hit her: left to her own devices, she had indeed begun the neverending spiral into blobhood.