stuck?

what is it that makes me crave that lighthearted companionship?
the now and then. the sunny. the super 8.
it's almost a decade since that time, but i miss it.
the singing on rooftops
the blending of daquiris
the skinnydipping under stars
the getting caught/citations for trespassing
the driving with the windows down, dancing to ridiculous music
the bad parking
the coffeecake and hobees
the swimming and the drama
the eating and the baking
the whispering and the spooning
the borrowing of clothes
the assurances and the confidence
that the world could be against us but we had each other and we were fine.

i feel that until junior year, i was kind of my own independent ship.  or maybe, i still do sort of live in this weird pseudoworld i invented for myself mixing beverly cleary, lm montgomery, and the babysitters club.

is friendship overrated?
i need to stop watching kid tv and start writing my papers and being a grown up.

No one knew my name in California either.

She said, "I think I'll go to Boston.  I think I'll start a new life.  I think I'll start it over where no one knows my name.  I'll get out of California--I'm tired of the weather.  I think I'll get a lover and fly him out to Spain.  And I think I'll go to Boston.  I think that I'm just tired.  I think I need a new town to leave this all behind.  I think I need a sunrise; I'm tired of the sunset.  I hear it's nice in the summer-- some snow would be nice.  You don't know me, you don't even care.  Boston: where no one knows my name.  Where no one knows my name.  where no one knows my name -- Boston.  No one knows my name."

Okay wow. This week's Once Upon A Time was a zinger. I take back what I said last week. (Although the werewolf thing has been done before (see: every other modern adaptation of Little Red Riding Hood).  But this time, around, their twist was good.

I don't really enjoy the main story thread in modern day Storybrooke, but i do like the side character stuff and I did like this week's fairy tale episode.

Speaking of fairytales, I really recommend this book: Truly Grim Tales by Priscilla Galloway.  You know a book is good when you think about it randomly.  I'm washing the dishes and suddenly I think of the prince in the Cinderella one (all of these short stories don't really tell you which fairy tale, they just hint at them).  I love the weird Red-RidingHood themed one too.

And they're all in this detached, first person.  It's just delicious, really.

Snippets of a weird weird dream

Been feeling emotional lately and been having weird sleeping patterns.
Today I felt panicked in the middle of my sleep but then assured myself that today was Saturday and not just Saturday but the Saturday starting Spring Break!  


I had a quest dream.  Those dreams are usually really interesting.
This time around, I was with a group of people that I knew (don't remember now) and I remember my little camel pak and blood.  I remember also at the end, a guy (friend's bf) was barbequing and I told him he could have the grill since my parents moved.  He told me to open the backdoor and I didn't understand why, but I put on my indoor slippers and went outside when someone else was out there and I understood oh he wanted me to open the door for him. and as someone else was walking by i yelled "back door" and he walked in.
This is another thing I notice about dreams. i never really get the chance to eat in them. there was ONE dream where I ate a feast.. and I think that was a triumph for me b/c i never get a chance to eat in a dream. ever.

anyway.
the main snippets i remember is that we're by water, and you have to be careful b/c there are some weird creatures living there. i knew one person in my team had some sort of spell or something happened to them in regards to me, so she was following me, as i was trying to get water to wash off the blood from my camel pak. but every time she followed me (she's actually sally's cousin suyeon. weird.) the water in the creeks became mud, so I couldn't dunk my camel pak.  and i was going out further into the creek to find water, and she was following me. so then, i told her to leave, and told her to stay with the others, and brought someone else with me, and the water was there.

another main snippet (the one that sticks with me the most) is that we were on a trail in a large tunnel and at first the rocky path hurt a lot and i was worried about tripping.  next to the rocky path, was this small bamboo fence looking thing.  It was this low fence, about the height of my knee, and it was stacked bamboo on its side so that the top was rounded, smooth bamboo.  i realized i could walk on that b/c it felt better for my bare feet.  however as i walked (pretty quickly since my feet felt better), the tunnel began to get smaller and then i had to get back on the rocky path, and then i had to crawl on my tummy.  I was at a point where I wondered if i could get out b/c the exit was so small, when suddenly, i felt it give (right when i felt that i'd stick) and i was out. i remember feeling concerned b/c there was a large, asian boy behind me, but I think he made it okay too.

I just remember a lot of creeks and outdoors stuff in my dream. i remember one of my friends swimming deep in that watery creek when she wasn't supposed to b/c you don't know what lives in there.

there wasn't a lot of action in my dream, but it was pretty nerve-wracking nonetheless.


I've started to grind my teeth at Harvard. I wonder if dreams like that make me more or less stressed.  I try to make sure my mouth is open when i sleep.  my neck's been hurting for a week now too.  ho hum.

No way jose!

Tim Tebow,
When I read this: Tim Tebow in Talks to Be The Bachelor?
I scoffed.  Heck no!  This is like the rumor of Jeremy Lin dating a Kardashian!

BUT THEN  What
i saw this:
"Judging by the public interest in his dinner date with Taylor Swift, the NFL star would likely attract quite a roster of women willing to vie for his attention on the ABC reality show."


What?  Really, Tim?!  You went on a date with her?  This is like the time when I lost respect for Adam (from Owl City) for doing that really embarrassing profession for Taylor Swift (where you professed your love but she didn't really return it...).  Why?  Dah.

In other news...

I just love this:

You can only take so much conflict.

I wish Once Upon a Time would just freaking solve their mysteries already.
I mean, it's almost like a deus ex machina device to just have every extraneous character try to leave StoryBrooke and crash their car.  Ugh.

That's like the catch-all solution for all conflict issues.

How awesome would it be if this all turned out to be a fluke and Henry was just crazy?  Actually, that wouldn't be awesome, I'd be mad.

Also, I'm concerned to the longevity of this show.  If this show is meant to last for seasonS rather than one season, this means that.. most likely the enchantment WON'T be broken and they'll continue to keep on introducing new characters, continuing different storylines (that parallel current storylines) and those new storylines will only vague connect to or continue traditional fairy tales.  This could get old real quick.

They still have yet to do the red riding hood story (I bet the mysterious journalist dude is the wolf).
They have to pick up Cinderella, where her prince, coincidentally disappears at the well (did he turn into a FROG?  is he the Frog prince?)
Also, how did Belle end up underground?
I guess they could also do a story for each dwarf.
We need to figure out how Snow White eats the apple.
There's always room for more Rumplestiltskin.
also contemporary storyline, we have to find that wife.  There must be some story for that diner waitress. Henry's been missing for a while.  And HOW come DAVID never had to take responsibility for the fact that he's a wishy-washy, cheating, no-good, not even that good looking husband?

Dang.. there's going to be SO much room for more meandering.. this is going to take forever.
Groan.  I just want an ending.


Other fairy tales they have yet to tap into:

Rapunzel (THAT would be good.  I bet Rumplestiltskin is the kidnapping witch.. he's like the catch-all villain).
Peter Pan (more fairies, yay! and a boy child!  and maybe they'll add a twist by making Wendy another teacher in real life and the Peter Pan boy, her high school student.  Okay, am I going too far?)
3 Little Pigs
Alice in Wonderland (not a fairytale, but come on, they brought in a genie, they can surely bring in Alice in Wonderland).
Little Mermaid
Sleeping Beauty
Thumbelina
Swan Princess
12 Dancing Princesses


Wow, there's SO many girls and so few guys.  This show is definitely full of just pretty girls.. which is a good thing for all those actresses out there.  And there are only so many huntsmen you can have.. maybe it's the same one guy for all the girls.  It's like Big Love. fairytale edition!

Speaking of spoofs:  Love it.

obvious plastic surgery

it makes me sad that ppl feel the need to change their face.
but i also wonder where you draw the line.

for example, i altered my skull too: i got braces.  is that different from a nose job?  it was for vanity.

or eyelids?  gah..


anyway, i guess if it looks natural, it's better, but when it sticks out.. it's so weird.

for example: this dude:

it's so OBVIOUS he got something done to his face.

and it looks really similar to this girl here:

 who when i FIRST saw her, was thoroughly shocked at how fake she looked, but then slowly warmed up to her because frankly, she's a really good actress.  but why did she have to.. change her face so much to look kind of like this exaggerated doll?


i tink it has something to do with the lips. they're unnaturally.. symmetrical and.. pouty?  or the top of the lip?  and the nose.  the lips and the nose.. just.. look different.


I feel like beauty is more apparent when there's an imperfection.
I remember when I first saw Charlize Theron (in The Italian Job), feeling slightly confused b/c I felt so neutral towards her face.  Everyone gushed about her beauty, but I think, she felt too... perfect?  like everything was too symmetrical and proportional, that it reminded me of a plastic barbie doll.


Whereas Uma Thurman, or Katharine Hepburn.  When I first saw them, I knew they weren't ugly, but I didn't think them beautiful.  However, Thurman's prominent nose, and Hepburn's strong jaw, slowly, as I kept seeing them, became the exact part that enhanced and confirmed their beauty.  Am I being crazy here?  I don't know.  I just FEEL like this is true.  Something has to draw your attention to the face.. if everything is proportional/symmetrical, I think your eyes could have a tendency to just glide over it.