my uc berk app sucked
and for my stanford app, i messed up on the recommendors part... so i basically just submitted 3 edu. recs rather than a professional one.. and that sucks.
i also realized i've been flaking and i should've notified faculty earlier.
so i kind of just want to throw in the towel and try again next year.
b/c this is definitely not my best foot forward.
and i feel sucky sucky sucky.
in a God is sovereign, hold plans loose kind of way.
i just mess up a LOT.
and they're all preventable mistakes.
that's what bugs me.
it's like... i'm a neat, orderly, anal person locked up inside a clumsy, impulsive, mistake-prone person. HELP HELP ME OUT!
i'm like a perfect, explosive mixture of my mom and my dad. -___- groan.